Best Frand™

Kathryn and I have been bff’s since 2001, aka 126 dog years

Kathryn and me, chilling at her mom’s, post-spaghetti dinner

Not everyone is lucky to have a best friend. I’ve been blessed with a few, but this post is dedicated to my OG, my A1 day 1, the one affectionately titled “Best Frand™” — Kathryn. We met in 6th grade when we were 11-years-old, and almost 18 years later, she is still stuck with me. As I got older, I realized how uncommon it is for people to have a friendship like this. It’s like something out of a movie about two best friends mailing each other a pair of jeans, going to their high school reunion to lie about inventing Post-its, and then killing a man and driving off of a cliff. We’re like Christina and Courtney from The Sweetest Thing, only we have less money and neither of us were blessed with boobs like Christina Applegate’s.

Us looking foine at my law school’s Barrister’s Ball

We have been attached at the hip for a while, working at 3 different jobs together and spending almost every day together during undergrad. We didn’t even go to the same university, but everyone on my campus knew Kathryn and everyone in her sorority house knew me. But while we do a lot of things together, we are still very different people who aren’t afraid to forge our own path.

In our early twenties, Kathryn took jobs and internships outside of Memphis, including Colorado, Massachusetts, and New Orleans. She has never liked staying put in the same place, and I was excited for her to venture out of our hometown. While she was in New Orleans, I decided to go to law school and stay in Memphis. The cool thing about a true best friendship is that you can be two different people with different goals and different adventures but still be in sync. We stayed in touch constantly despite being in different cities, and when we reunited, it was as if we had never been apart.

We found matching clearance gowns in both of our sizes, and yes, we bought them

After I moved to DC, Kathryn started exploring the possibility of grad school. She has a BBA in Finance, and she worked in her field for a little while after graduation. But she had bigger goals and dreams and wanted to pursue something that she was more passionate about. Of course I supported her going back to school, and I knew that it was an opportunity for her to go to yet another new city. I thought maybe Boston or Portland would call to her. So when she told me that the exact master’s program she wanted to enroll in was here in DC, I was ecstatic.

Our nighttime tour of DC, Thanksgiving 2017

So what’s the secret recipe for a best friendship that survives almost 2+ decades? I don’t know if there is an exact formula, but my experience includes —

  • Understanding that growing together doesn’t mean that we have to do the exact same things or choose the same lifestyle
  • Supporting each other, but also letting each other know when we genuinely think something is a bad idea or harmful
  • Watching out for snakes in one another’s gardens
  • Laughing a lot and being goofy together; even if no one else gets it, you get each other
Being goofy before my wedding (she was my MOH, of course)

If you have a best friend like I do, don’t take that for granted. It’s a special thing. Besides, who else are you going to do witchcraft with in your mom’s basement?

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